WHAT HAPPENED IN NEW JERSEY??????????????

I have waited to post a response to this cruel event in order to give all sides a thorough investigation as there is nothing worse than posting a "knee jerk" reaction and then eating your words later.

I would like to cover the story from a different angle.  Let us ask ourselves what are the causes and effects on both sides and what is it that WE, the universe of beings, can do to prevent this from happening to us or those we love.

1st what caused a person to think it would be funny to video tape a private moment that another person, ANY PERSON might be happening.   Is it that we have become so inamored with entertaining ourselves and others that we no longer think of the consequences.  From what I have read and seen in all the magazines, news reports, blogs and tv reports, there was no one saying "hey if we do this it might make someone upset?" or "do you think Tyler would disagree with this?"  or even "Would I want someone to do this to me?"
Are we truley living in a time where we do not consider another persons feelings to the point of making such disasterous decisions?  It is here that we shall look at the causes.

• A.  Where do all of our choices, ideas, and examples come from and when can we be held responsible for our own actions?    
• B.  What is the importance of the family unit?
• C.  What is the importance of community?
• D.  What is the difference between community and institution?
• E.  What are really being taught and by whom 

There are of course many debates on this topic.  Some will go so far as to say that a child is not even considered a "real" person until they are born so let it be well understood that is my personal oppinon from the research I have done.  Keep an open mind because information is only as good as your reaction to it.

WHERE DO ALL OF OUR CHOICES / IDEAS & EXAMPLES 1ST COME FROM - is the 1st part of question A.  This is an obvious answer.  FROM HOME.  The house hold is the 1st microcosom of the social and the spiritual world to our children.   It is from the house hold that children learn how to interact one with another and how to interact with their version of God. If a child should be so lucky as to have 2 parents then he/she is in the 73% of children who were reported to be raised by a single parent in the 2009 census. 
So what's the "average" single parent really like? According to the U.S. Census Bureau...

She is a Mother:

• Approximately 84% of custodial parents are mothers (based on most recent studies this is because the man in the relationship has commited an act of infidelity / abuse or been widowed hence custodialship is left to the more responsible partner in cases of abuse or infidelity, and
• 16% of custodial parents are fathers who have either widowed or are also victims of acts of infidelity

She is Divorced or Separated:

Of the 84% of mothers who are custodial parents:

• 45% are currently divorced or separated (due to financial disagreements / infidelity / abuse)
• 34.2% have never been married (women who have had children out of wedlock / adopted or left children from a family member who has been deceased)
• 19% are married (In most cases, these numbers represent women who have remarried.)
• 1.7% were widowed

Of the 16% of fathers who are custodial parents:

• 57.8% are divorced or separated - (due to financial disagreements / infidelity / abuse)
• 20.9% have never married - (women who have had children out of wedlock / adopted or left children from a family member who has been deceased)
• 20% are currently married (In most cases, these numbers represent men who have remarried.)
• Fewer than 1% were widowed

She is Employed:

• 79.5% of custodial single mothers are gainfully employed to support what is now considered a "normal family environment" This is usually not the choice of the parent now supporting the children after all, not many of us choose to have children and then just leave them for another person to take care of.  This is another article in and of itself.
• 49.8% work full time, year round 29.7% work part-time or part-year                         
•  20.5% are unemployeed and living off the government
• 90% of custodial single fathers are gainfully employed
• 71.7% work full time, year round 18.4% work part-time or part-year                        
•  9.9 are unemployeed and living off the government

She and Her Children Do Not Live in Poverty:

• 27% of custodial single mothers and their children live in poverty
• 12.9% of custodial single fathers and their children live in poverty

She Does Not Receive Public Assistance:

Among custodial single mothers:

• 22% receive Medicaid
• 23.5% receive food stamps
• 12% receive some form of public housing or rent subsidy
• 5% receive receive TANF (Temporary Assistance for Needy Families)

She is 40 Years Old or Older:

• 39.1% of custodial single mothers are 40 years old or older

She is Raising One Child:

• 54% of custodial mothers are raising one child from the absent parent
• 46% have two or more children living with them 

In the light of the above stated material above who is it that usually takes the blame for parents seperating?  We know that it is the children of course.  This influences how they think act towards the partner whether they be male or female.  For example, usually the child living with the mother is poisoned to think negative thoughts about his/her father or males and vice/versa for those being raised by the Father or male.   This is but a small part of the exposure children have towards not caring about another person or their feelings, after all, did anyone ask the children whether or not they thought their parents should divorce? Were the childrens opinions considered valid or of any importance?  As previously stated, divorce and seperations are inevitable in cases of infidelity or abuse but the affect on children is never the less the same.  A child percieves that their opinion is of no value and in this insecurity a bully or person of calouse thinking is born.

THE 2ND PART OF THIS QUESTION IS WHERE ARE THE EXAMPLE OF SOCIAL CULTURE 1ST BORN - of course again the family - whether they are seperated / married / grandparents or government sponsored.   What is the averager American family doing everyday?

I'm going to keep our focus in one general area and skirt around where the other areas may be. My main focus is going to be around the #1 reason that we, as the United States are not even rated in the top 15 out of 36 other countries in academics and literacy and that is the TV.


Now that everything has gone digital and we are connected to everything ALL the time whether it be by satellite / phone or internet, there's no lack of PROGRAMING the young minds today. We have become a generation that would rather watch someone else living the dream instead of going for the dream ourselves. The latest Neilson rating shows that over 90% of Americans are watching at least 4 to 5 hours of TV a day or about 28 to 35 hours a week - that's as much as a part time (almost full time) job. If you don't think the impact of the TV is making a difference then just look around at what the youth of today is wearing, drinking, eating and talking about. Most of us are just quoting the spin doctors, singing the songs and emulating the styles and attitudes of their favorite TV show and with the popularity of public video websites showing people invading others privacy for laughs and getting sponsors to pay for getting high viewer volume, we are encouraged to go further and further for those viewers. After all, it's okay if there's a camera on every street corner and in every store right? So what's the big deal if we tape our friends and family in their own private time? I think we just answered that question with this happen - stance in New Jersey.

TO BE CONTINUED...........................