BUY IT NOW - BACK OFF BULLIES Vol 1 IS HERE

This has been 4 years in the making and producing but it's finally here. 6th Degree Black Belt Professor McKey has produced a revolutionary method of Non-Violent Self Defense for grade school children. This is a 2 disk Vol with over 40 NON VIOLENT self defense techniques geared for grade school and up.

Back Off Bullies is a compilation of several different systems of Martial Arts used in the KENJIUKAI Combat System. The combinations of the differnt styles helps a student of KENJIUKAI make a choice about hurting another person and that choice is safety and humanity. Professor McKey has devised this system of self defense in the hopes that it will spawn a deeper concern for mankind and teach the community at large that everyone is special and deserving of a 2nd, 3rd and even 4th chance.

Check out more at www.respect1st.weebly.com

HERE'S HOW I READ ARTICLES I SEE ON BULLYING

Here is an article on the kind of advice being given to parents out there and I thought I should pick this apart from a professional’s opinion.

Dealing With Bullies

My 8-year-old son feels he is being bullied by neighborhood kids and he has threatened them back. He also has two sisters and feels invisible as the middle child in our family. What should I do?

"Our job as parents is to keep our kids safe. Always encourage your son to tell you if he is being bullied and how it makes him feel." --- I agree with this 100% but, this only happens when the parents are better listeners than advice givers. If all you do is solve your child’s problems each time they bring them to you, then you have enabled him/her from working the problem out them selves. Be a facilitator not a dictator.

"Remind him that it is not his fault"----- Evaluate to make sure it's not his/her fault because it could be.

"Suggest that he stay away from those kids and persuade him not to threaten back." ---- I agree that threatening is not the way to go but in some instances, better results are gained by at least standing up for your self and letting the bullies know that you are not going to take it any more. Most bullies are bark and no bite. This has been proven over and over again through out the years so don't be afraid to speak your mind when you know the time is right. Speaking your mind when it's 5 to 1 may not be the right time to stand up for yourself. If you have the ability to either draw attention to your situation or get away, you stand a better chance of standing up to bullies.

"You need to encourage him to be the "better person. Have him tell the kids who are bullying him that he doesn't like it and that they should stop! He could just say "Quit it, David" and then walk away." --- Although this is the best thing to do theoretically, sometimes you cannot just walk away and just saying STOP does not always work. If you are going to say stop and walk away, remember to keep your eye on the bully because there's nothing worse than being jumped from behind.

"Remind him that bullies like to upset people, so if he can keep his cool and react with a calm voice rather than an angry voice, the bully will not get the desired response." --- Some bullies see the calm voice as a target to continue the taunting. They see it as a challenge. I encourage you to day nothing and make eye contact with a confident face. Saying nothing makes you unpredictable and unpredictable is not what the bully is counting on.

"If your son doesn't feel comfortable saying that to the bully by himself, he could ask someone to be there when he does speak face to face with the bully. The bully might be more open to listening than to bullying when another person is present." --- Again, I say that if you are going to address bullies you need to be confident and make sure they know that you are not satisfied with their behavior. Having someone around when you do this only allows you the comfort in knowing someone will intercede if things go bad.

"Also, if your son doesn't feel comfortable with what you are suggesting, encourage him to just walk away but to still tell you about it." --- Remember what I said earlier, you will only get this to happen if you have established a reputation for being a listener and not a problem solver.

"You can discreetly go and have a word with the bully's parents and see if they can do something about their child's bullying ways." --- This sounds great but will only work if you have hard facts to back it up, have reports from the school or pictures that you have taken of bruises and scrapes or even text messages and posts that have been saved. Make sure that you are going to solve the problem and not add fuel to the fire. You could be causing a bigger problem than you ever imagined. Just make sure you evaluate the situation 1st. It may be better to get the principal or a 3rd party involved 1st with the child’s parents as their emotions won't be so raw and on edge. Regardless how bad children are, they are still someone’s child and the mothering instinct to protect and not believe another person may kick in but from a teacher or principal you may get better results.



Over all the suggestions aren't bad but make sure you read between the lines when you see an article like this. After all only you know your child. Each case of bullying is different so the suggestions here may or may not work so do your research on the subject and trust your gut.

Until next time, Be the change you want to see.

TOO MUCH FOCUS ON PUNISHMENT

I just finished watching movie about crimes and punishments and it stirred an emotion of anger and justice inside me. I started thinking of all the unspeakable crimes that are perpetrated and go unnoticed in our society these days.

The real question is, “what do you do with that anger”? After all, don’t we all get angry once in a while? Haven’t we all said “That’s not fair” and “He deserved what he got”? If you’re like me, you’ve said and meant this but was that the right thing to say? Was that the right way to act and think? Are we thinking about the solution in this frame of mind or are we just focused on how unfairly we’ve been treated or are we allowing our own bullying instinct to take over when someone gets punished for a crime they committed?

At what point in that criminals’ life would someone made a difference after all, it was more than likely the environment and society around him that caused him/her to do what they did and that same environment and society now wants to punish him or her. Does that make any sense?

Just like any maddening cycle, we have to change the way we are grooming criminals of any type so where does it start? Each of us has a circle of influence that in some small way we have say so and our words mean something. This is where we can spark a change that can make a difference. Just remember not to be involved in judging, criticizing, pigeon holing, pointing the finger, blaming, classifying or hating. Instead, let’s find the solution.

Be the change you want to see in stead of trying to change those around you. We need a cure, NOT a band aid.

CLICK HERE to read the article

Bully Presentation

Remember, this is but the tip of the ice berg on bully prevention - Please don't hesitate to email me your questions about bullying in your life, school or neighborhood. Together we can be the change we want to see.

Bully presentation

View more presentations from jay mckey.

DO WE REALLY NEED THE GOVERNMENT TO TELL US TO BE NICE

ANTI BULLYING LAW IS STRUCK DOWN in

NEW YOUR LEGISLATURE -

In a way I'm glad this law was taken down. Do we really need the government to force us to be nice to each other. Does being forced to be nice really make a person nice or will they just find another way to be mean. In my years of experience dealing with the human ego and phsyce I can tell you that people are a result of thier surroundings. It is each persons job to project kindness in everything they do so that all may be affected and invited to join in the unity of peace and harmony with their fellow man. This is the only way to create and invite change. Check this out and remember to BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE.

BUM BASHING

You might have asked yourself "so what's so wrong with letting my kids watch so much violence on T.V. and so what if they play violent video games for at least 3 to 4 hours a day" Well, here's your answer.

Violence just for the fun of it - after all, it's all they know and it's how you raised them.



It's not too late to take our kids back. Turn off the mindless violence and stop this epidemic

ABC NEWS - Bullying Story

Here's a sad turn of events where what some people think is harmless goes deadly wrong. The cruelty of our youth is only exasterbated by the amount of time they spend filling thier minds with useless dribble. Everything from primetime teen soaps to wastefull lyrics and violent packed movies. These are the things that have been proven study after study to transform the minds of our youth into cruel accomplises to destructive behaivor and even lead some to death.





Parents, do your children a favor when you can. Get to know them and allow them to know you. Turn that darn TV OFF and limit the amount of time they spend in front of that nasty machine. Remember, if they are spending more time in front of the TV than they are you, then the TV is realy raising your kids.

It's not to late to take our kids back.